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Recession News – The Solution

Posted by | Evil Kristos | February 15, 2011 | No Comments

I believe I found the solution to our problems. After seeing the so called leadership debate yesterday it dawned on me that we got nothing to expect from them. I don’t even know why we are having this election. It will cost a fortune. Do we have money to spare?

Actually I knew that we have nothing to expect from Enda Kenny and the likes since the opposition supported the finance bill. Obviously they have nothing to add to the government’s plan to make the one part of the population pick up the tab that benefitted the least from the Celtic Tiger. And at the same time they protect the so called elite; the ones that caused the dilemma. What irony? What a surprise?

So we got absolutely nothing to expect from our politicians other than warm air coming out of their mouths. I wonder what they will do once the entire potential work force leaves the country and Ireland is left with only politicians, bankers and pensioners. Ask ze Germans? But that’s the subject of another pamphlet.

What I wanted to say is that I actually expect the situation to get a lot worse. We are not getting much now from our leaders now. We know that. I reckon however that we will get even less after the election. I mean face it. Let’s assume for a second Enda Kenny will be the next Taoiseach. It’s not a pleasant thought but just theoretically. What is going to happen? He will produce absolutely no results whatsoever and … blame it on the previous government that left him with no choices. He will then retire funded by our tax money and live the dream. They all do.

That he himself was part of the system and that he could have opposed Brian Cowens evil schemes he will have forgotten at that stage. Every single member of the current Dáil should be ashamed of themselves and not only step down and get a job but also without taking the generous pension scheme we are providing for them. That would save a lot of money and not a single child would have to starve by doing so. Can our government say the same about their proposals?

Obviously this isn’t going to happen and therefore it’s not a solution to our problems. I in my initial statement said I have a solution and if you read this blog in the past you will know that it would not be the first time that the government followed my proposals. I suggest we should RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

We obviously live in some sort of fantasy world. At least that’s what I gather from our political leaders. We live in a Hollywood movie with evil villains, corrupt politicians, golden handshakes, back room politics and moral decay. It is like Wall Street meets Bugsy Malone but without the cool trench coats. We live in some sort of Disney Land but the Dr. Evil version, where corporations pay f*ck all while the poor people pick up the tab. This is how Karl Marx initially became popular by the way! 19th century Britain.

We live in a country where despite everybody knowing what is going on, where the money is and how to get it we rather tax the poor. I am strangely reminded of Terry Pratchett’s Disc World. And it is just as he described it; Ankh-Morpork (Baile Átha Cliath in Irish) is run by morons and crooks. And the wizards in the Unseen University (in Ireland they go by the name banker and live in a tower of their own) provide the magic with the aid of non-existent funds. He knew it all along only we didn’t realise.

Since we live in such place I demand the KRAKEN. Everything is possible on Disc World. What am I a paying tax for? To watch Enda Kenny, Micheál Martin and Eamon Gilmore on prime time? As if that would solve our problems. Let’s have some fun and sacrifice a princess. How about Mary Harney?

Evil Kristos you might say at this stage. That’s insane. How would this help? Behold I say. Let me finish. The Kraken is the vengeful monster as described in the Clash of the titans where the Greek goods released the Kraken to punish the people of Joppa for their blasphemy. Obviously the foolish people of Joppa did not have a wise government to pass a blasphemy bill in the middle of the biggest crisis this country has ever faced. Anyways; I believe that if the Irish government would stand up and publicly demand to release the Kraken, the other European countries would realise that they were dealing with a bunch of idiots and bail us out with only condition attached: Get rid of the government. All of them!

And there comes in my earlier argument to sack them all and let them live on the dole money they so generously handed out to others while they were in power. Male parta male dillabuntur


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