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The inevitable – Germany has Groko


Posted by | Evil Kristos | December 30, 2013 | No Comments

Germany has a new government and – as predicted – we have a great coalition between CDU and SPD. After 6 weeks of negotiations between the parties, they agreed to enter a the great coalition under the leadership of Angie Merkel. As if there was ever any doubt. I am tempted to call it “The worst case scenario”.

And we have a new word Groko. Its an abbreviation (more an abomination) and stands for Große Koalition – great coalition, except there is nothing great about it. It just means the current government has an overwhelming majority of 504 out of 631 seats in the Bundestag. It effectively means that there is no opposition anymore. Angie can rule like a queen.

There are a few lessons we learned. For a start: The Social Democrats (SPD) are a bunch of morons. They are so power-hungry that they forgot what became of them last time they entered a coalition with Angie and the Christian Democrats (CDU). They lost almost a third of their voter base.

Secondly and this is as scary: The two parties negotiated for 6 weeks and drafted a 180-page “treaty” that describes their plans for the next 4 years. Nothing in it is really binding so they wasted 6 weeks already doing absolutely nothing but writing a letter of intend. This is probably our prospect for the next 4 years: A lot of talking and absolutely no doing anything at all. Poor Germany.

Of course there are some good news as well. The Liberal Democrats got kicked out of the Bundestag. That was about time.

Even better, Ronald Pofalla is gone. He was Angies Chief of Staff and utterly useless. My favourite quote of him; after he went to the US to get some answers to Edward Snowdens NSA revelations and of what must be called the biggest spy scandal in history he stood in front of the press and told that he was assured there was no law broken so this affair is over. Of course that was right before Angie learned that even her phone was tapped.

With the FDP out it also means that Westerwelle is no longer Minister for Foreign Affairs. I consider this great news. He was most certainly the worst foreign minister of all times. Apart from alienating foreign nations he managed to remain unpopular in Germany. That’s quite an achievement considering that he had one of the most prestigious jobs the republic has to offer. Foreign ministers normally top the “most popular politicians charts” but not him. Frank-Walter Steinmeier is back and – quite frankly – he is good at this.

One interesting new assignment is our new Federal Minister of Defence. Ursula von der Leyen is the first woman becoming the first soldier in the country and my guess is she will be good at it. She has seven children and her becoming the “mother of the company” is just a question of time. She is probably the most capable of all the people in Angies cabinet so best of luck to her.

As for the rest … one way to put it is, none of us got the government we voted for. Conservatives have to live with SPD being part of the government, while the lefties have to live with the fact that Angie is still chancellor. But that is only one side of it.

The last election highlighted the flaws in our electoral system like no election before. Despite the majority the government has, the majority of eligible voters did not actually vote for this government. And I’ll prove it to you.

There is the 29,5 % of people who did not vote at all. Then we have to add these 15% of voters who voted for parties that did not make it into the new Bundestag. That’s 6,86 million votes that basically didn’t count. Adding to these 44.5% the 8.4% that voted for the Green Party and the 8.6% for the Left Party we have a staggering 61.5% of eligible voters that did not vote for a government that has the overwhelming majority (Roughly 80%!) in the current Bundestag. How is this even possible?

The CDU missed the absolute majority by only a few votes. Still looking at the numbers the CDU represents only about a third of German voters. What’s the point of running elections if a third of the votes could grant you absolute power? There is something seriously wrong in our so-called democracy.

All hail the Angie then.

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